Traffic was terrible as usual and I had barely made it on time for my first day at work. The morning rush however could not ruin my happiness. I was about to resume to the job of my dreams, it was everything I had wished for.
My office was located in one of those rare sky scrapers we have in lagos. Gorgeously dressed, make up on ‘fleek’ and approved by my mirror, I stood in front of the elevator. The only downside to my job was the fact that my office was located on the 24th floor.
The warm fragrance I perceived snapped me out of my thoughts, how could I’ve ignored it. I was a die-hard perfume freak and immediately recognised the fragrance. What caught my fancy wasn’t even the fragrance he was wearing but his physique, good God, he was fine!!!. I was about to pay him a complement but for the untimely intervention of my ringtone.
Finally the elevator was opened and we entered, along with the others patiently waiting. I found myself silently praying they came off before him, leaving the both of us with some alone time and secretly wishing he would talk to me. As if the universe heard me, the last person came off at the 15th floor “surprisingly” and as fate would have it we were the only ones left.
Suddenly it started, for few seconds I didn’t understand what was happening. My tummy was on fire and rumbled uncontrollably. I felt beads of sweat on my face. I wanted to scream but couldn’t find my voice. There he stood totally unaware of what I was going through, I couldn’t take it anymore, so I let it out. At first in bits, but then I gave in and it all came rushing out. I was so embarrassed but I summoned courage and apologized. He smiled and said, ‘it happens to the best of us, it’s only natural to fart’, he got off on the 20th floor. As the doors to the elevator closed, I was very certain that my chances of ever speaking to him had been shattered, given that nature decided to use me as its comic relief.
I was welcomed back to reality when the pastor asked if I would like to take this gorgeous looking man standing in front of me to be my lawful husband, for better or worse, I laughed at idea of worse, I couldn’t imagine what could have been worse than farting on the first day we met.